6.30.2007

Jerry, a Surly Ninja


Quick Stats:
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 265 pounds
Hair: Brown
Breath: Not good
Experience: Former investment banker. Became a ninja in 1987 after the Savings and Loan scandal left him homeless but inspired him to seek vengeance against corporate greed. Jerry learned ninja skills such as mind control and levitation from the ancient texts, and has used them to mysteriously amass a personal fortune. He maintains a white trash facade and often speaks crassly, both qualities lending him an element of stealth. He lives off the grid somewhere in Alabama.
Politics: Independent, but leaning towards Libertarian
Specialty Ninja Move: the two-fisted monkey

Prior appearances on this blog:
Jerry for President - the CNN/YouTube Republican Debate
Jerry on the subprime lending fiasco
A bit of poker trash-talking
NINJA - No Income, Job or Assets. Ouch.

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